The fact of the matter is that, during your pregnancy, it’s easy to focus on plans for labor and delivery. After all, especially for the new mother, the prospect of childbirth is quite daunting. If much thought is given at all to the postpartum period, it usually is limited to things like making sure the baby’s room is all set, or determining when your maternity leave is going to end. This is unfortunate, as there are quite a few changes that can happen to your and to your situation once your baby comes that just aren’t thought about very often.

Setting aside postpartum depression (after all, many women do take the time to learn at least a little bit about it and how to watch for it), there are common events and feelings you’re likely to have that you may not think about. Here are some of the postpartum conditions that may surprise you if you’re not planning for them:

• Bleeding. No matter whether you have a cesarean or whether you have a vaginal birth, you’re going to have a significant amount of postpartum bleeding. For the first few days, it’s going to be heavier than a period. From there, it’s going to last another six weeks or so. This bleeding is part of the process of healing up your body after childbirth.
• Weight loss. You’re only going to lose around half to a third of your pregnancy weight gain when your baby is born. It’s going to take a while to lose the rest. Don’t be in too much of a rush, or you’ll be very frustrated.
• Weeping. Even if you’re not experiencing postpartum depression, you are probably going to have some ups and downs. Your hormones are going to be all over the place. You might find yourself feeling very happy, yet still crying. You might get upset about truly unimportant things, as well. Expect at least a little weepiness for the first few weeks.
• Joy. Along with that sadness, you’re going to have moments of pure elation. Enjoy them, but realize that they, too, are fleeting.
• Sweating. You’re also going to sweat because of those hormone changes. Night sweats are most common. Be prepared to wake up with a soaked pillow and night shirt.

Many women struggle with losing the “baby weight.” It’s just a simple fact. The truth is that having a baby changes your body in a number of ways, and not all of them are entirely good. (That doesn’t mean they aren’t worth it, of course.) Only about 15 pounds of the weight you gain during pregnancy will be lost during delivery. That leaves anywhere from 10 to 20 more pounds to lose, assuming you gain the average of 25 to 35 pounds during pregnancy.

Still, there are some relatively basic things you can do after baby to lose weight. In fact, there are three steps you can follow that, while they don’t guarantee weight loss, can put you on the fast track to getting your body back in shape after baby. Here they are:

• Walk. You don’t have to do an aerobics class or run marathons. Simply walk. Walk at least 30 minutes a day. This will keep your metabolism going, and burn away some excess calories.
• Limit TV. Research shows that people who watch two hours or more of TV a day tend to be bigger than people that don’t. Limit the amount of TV you view in a day, and you’ll be surprised how much more active you are.
• Avoid saturated fats and trans fats. You can’t (and shouldn’t) avoid fats altogether, however you should limit your intake of saturated fats. You can also eliminate trans fats from your diet altogether.

These steps don’t guarantee weight loss after baby. You can’t do these things but still take in 3,000 calories a day and expect to lose the baby weight. Over the long haul, if you’re going to lose all of that weight after baby, you’re going to need to make some other changes, both in terms of diet and exercise. However, if you start with these basic principles and refuse to compromise on them in any way, you’ll start out on the fast track to postpartum weight loss, and you’ll have your body in shape before you know it.

In many ways, pregnancy is (and should be) focused on the mom. After all, it’s her body that’s going to be doing all of the heavy lifting, both during pregnancy and even afterwards. Still, there are some things that dads can do to help out. This is true both during pregnancy, as well as after pregnancy. That postpartum period actually gives dads a chance to really shine, if they know what to do.

Here are some of the ways that dads can do their part during the postpartum phase, and really step in and give some relief to moms:

• If you feel left out, say so. Because all of that focus is on the moms, dads can feel left out. Talk with your partner about your feelings, and start a dialogue.
• Be supportive and understanding. Let’s be honest. The postpartum period is one of emotional ups and downs. Most of them won’t make sense to you. That’s all right. You can be supportive without understanding it.
• Watch out for postpartum depression. You’re the first line of defense when it comes to recognizing a problem with postpartum depression. Learn what signs to watch for, and then be ready to talk to your spouse if you believe she’s suffering from postpartum depression.
• Do everything but breastfeed. You can get up with baby, you can change diapers, you can take baby to doctor appointments and more.
• Help out with breastfeeding. Obviously, your help here is more along the way of moral support. Tell her you’re proud that she’s doing so well with it, and help defend her against potential negative comments from outsiders.
• Learn to do the dishes. Pick up on several of the household tasks that you may not normally do. Help out with older children, too. Keep Mom focused on herself and the baby.
• Be ready for change. Introducing a new member to the family changes things. Not all of those changes will be positive, but they will be worth it. Don’t long for the days gone by, but instead revel in your recent family addition.